If you have a 7-year-old son, it can still be difficult to control his anger … but it is not an impossible mission!
An outburst of anger and rage from a 7 year old can be really intense … you will hear screams that say “I hate you” when you do not let him watch television anymore or when there are fights between siblings. Any parent wonders what behaviors are normal for their 7-year-old … and will want to improve those behaviors that are not normal.
A 7-year-old who is well behaved most of the time thinks before he acts, and may be upset, but he may calm down on his own as well . While it is normal to feel angry from time to time, indomitable anger that results in injury or damaged body parts requires intervention to prevent more serious emotional and behavioral problems in the future.
FIND THE UNDERLYING CAUSE
It is necessary to realize whether the anger of the 7-year-old only occurs in certain situations or with certain family members. It would also be necessary to assess whether it could result in problems of disobedience or in the functioning of the family. Solving these problems requires different anger management strategies.
Disobedience requires effective commands and warnings , offering choices, allowing the child to say no in a respectful way, using agreed individual words or signals for direction, withdrawing privileges, focusing on win-win solutions, and finding helpful ways for them to the child feels influential.
To improve family functioning, strengthen the bond between parents and children, improve family interactions, and develop family routines and rituals. If the child has outbursts of anger that seem out of control with the situation in many settings, then the problem is really anger.
ASSESS READINESS FOR ANGER MANAGEMENT
Children under the age of 8 will benefit first from learning to identify and express feelings . Increasing the vocabulary of the child’s feelings through conversation, role play, and role modeling helps him better understand and articulate the experiences he experiences.
Incorporate day-to-day conversations about the feelings you have in performing daily activities using a feeling chart. If the child denies having an anger problem and resists, withdrawing and soliciting the cooperation of all family members to work on their anger promotes cooperation and progress.
Defining anger helps the child understand it. Anger is a feeling of discomfort or pain that occurs in response to something that is not going your way. Defining and discussing the range of anger, from mild frustration and irritation to anger, allows the child to identify and describe it when it occurs.
TEACH SIGNS OF ANGER AND RELAXATION
The body , thought, and action cues warn children that they need to practice an anger management strategy. Help children identify physiological signs , such as flushing, clenched fists, or sweating, thoughts like “You’re stupid,” and actions like crying, threatening, or fidgeting, that occur when you are angry.
Breathing deeply and visualizing a relaxing scene reduces the physical tension associated with anger. The “robot / rag doll technique” for younger children also works: instruct the child to tense all the muscles, visualizing himself as a robot, after 15 seconds, releasing all tension, becoming a doll of rag. Effective use of these skills when angry requires extensive practice of them during non-stressful times.
Helpful personal dialogue involves developing thoughts that will help calm the child by noticing the body, thought, or action cues. Examples include: “Take it easy”, “Keep calm”, “I will do my best”, “Don’t let it bother me.” Role-play situations that use ineffective behaviors in response to anger, and then contrast them with the use of helpful personal conversation are also effective. Developing an individualized list of examples helps the child use them when necessary.
Teach children to solve problems
Problem solving includes identifying the problem, determining its cause, speculating on the feelings and thoughts of those involved, and determining a plan of action. Examples include expressing feelings or needs, relaxing, being distracted, or asking for a hug. A 7-year-old may struggle with this step due to developmental limitations in abstract thinking, and may require more help or direct suggestions from an adult.
Dr. Tabriella Perivolaris, Sara's mother and fan of fashion, beauty, motherhood, among others, about the female universe. Since 2018 she has been working as a copywriter, always bringing to her articles a little of her experience and experience as a mother and woman.