Stress in adolescents, how do we help them?

Adolescence is a time of great anxiety and stress. In this period, boys face a whole revolution of hormonal reactions that produce both physical and mental changes, so, although it may not seem like it, the anxiety levels experienced by some may end up overflowing them . There are even psychological disorders, such as schizophrenia , that have their starting point in adolescence because it is the time in life when the person begins to face truly worrying situations.

STRESS MAINTAINED OVER TIME ENDS UP WEARING US DOWN

Adolescents face situations that trigger large doses of stress every day:

1. Bullying:

It is not unusual to be bullied . It is something that has existed all our lives in high schools, only now it seems that society has become more aware of the issue because many cases that previously went hidden have been made public. However, there are more than you would have us believe. Only the most shocking reach our ears but they are only the tip of the iceberg , we see only one part of the large number that exist. Children or adolescents who suffer bullying are characterized by: suddenly lowering their school performance, not wanting to go to class, sleeping problems, lack of appetite (or binge eating), depressive symptoms, emotional dullness and irritability.

2. Exams or little free time:

Overwork is stressful for everyone. Adolescents are more sensitive because they are not yet used to so much demand, it is now that they have to start organizing and studying in advance for exams, especially high school students who will soon face the dreaded PAU . The kids who have left everything to the last minute will have to binge study, and that is not a bed of roses. That is why many students get sick during exam time, because pressure and stress weaken their immune system and it is easier for them to contract diseases.

Sometimes it is not the exams themselves that cause stress, but the little free time they have. Having a very busy schedule is stressful for anyone. There are kids who after high school have extracurricular activities, a language academy, private lessons … And on top of that they have to make time for studies! It’s a lot of pressure!

3. Loss of a family member or friend:

The death of a loved one affects everyone, but for a teenager it can be a real trauma. When a child loses a loved one, they have a hard time but many do not fully understand the irreversibility of death and it does not affect them as much. An adult is aware of everything that a person’s death entails but has sufficient resources to overcome it over time (most of the time). In the case of adolescents it is different, they understand and understand, but many have not acquired the necessary skills to deal with it effectively.

4. Sentimental breakup:

We all know how intense teenage love can get. The first breakup when one is in love is always lived in despair . They believe that they will never fall in love again or that no one will ever want to be with them. Adults know that it is not true and they do not take it seriously, but children at that age do not see beyond what they are feeling in those moments.

HOW DO WE DETECT IF OUR CHILDREN HAVE STRESS?

It’s easy, we just have to look at a series of signs:

– Sleep problems: insomnia or waking up every two to three in the middle of the night is an indication that something is taking them away from sleep. Sometimes it can also happen that they go to bed so tired that it prevents them from reconciling it.

– Headaches: Does your child complain that he has a headache? If it is continuous, it could be due to stress, effort from studies, lack of rest or not eating properly.

– Irritability: if your child’s bad mood is constant, he answers you aggressively for no reason and complains that you are overwhelming him, welcome! It is the bread and butter of the adolescent world. However, if you notice that your mood is getting too bad lately, it is a sign of stress.

– Complains of continuous tiredness. Probably as a result of sleep problems. It can also happen that you sleep enough hours but wake up tired and without energy, that is because the sleep does not meet the minimum quality standards.

HOW CAN WE HELP THEM RELEASE THAT PRESSURE?

Once we have detected that he has stress, the first thing we have to do is find a quiet moment in which we know that nobody is going to bother us and talk to him , ask him how he is these days, but try not to overwhelm him, we do not want him to think which is an interrogation because they will close in band. He can’t feel pressure from you .

– Prepare leisure activities with him

There must be time for everything. It is not about him going out every day but you have to allow him enough time so that he can meet his friends and break with the routine. Even in exam periods the boy has to learn to disconnect from studies and other pressures.

– Teach him to be realistic

If your child is one of those who is busy every day with a thousand activities, help him organize himself. If he still can’t handle everything, make him understand that he has to give up something, even for a while. There are guys who are not realistic about studies. For example, if you have failed 6 subjects in June you have to be aware that it is very difficult to pass them all in September and that you would be less overwhelmed if you focus on 3 than if you try to get all 6 at once, apart from the fact that you are more likely to pass three if you prepare only those that if you try to prepare them all.

– Techniques of breathing and relaxation

Abdominal breathing is very useful to control anxiety and is good for everyone. Signing up for a couple of relaxation classes can come in handy for both of you, you will be showing him that you care and you are also giving him resources so that he can handle stress himself.

– Listen without criticizing

Don’t judge, just listen. When we have a problem sometimes we just want to be heard. Don’t give advice unless he specifically asks for it. If you say “I told you so” the only thing you will get is that they will not trust you again.

Finally, if you see that your child is really having a bad time and that this state lasts over time, you consider the idea of taking him to a professional , a psychologist can help him go through the bad drink and teach him effective strategies to cope with stress.