Tips for having sex again after childbirth
Depending on the delivery we have had and how we are recovering,
When having a baby, the woman must go through the hard labor of childbirth or in some cases, there are women who must undergo a cesarean section because it is necessary to avoid complications in a vaginal delivery. This process in order to bring a baby into the world leaves consequences for mothers that must recover in the weeks after delivery . But what should be taken into account?
Index
IF YOU HAD A NORMAL DELIVERY
If you had a normal vaginal delivery, experts recommend waiting four to six weeks before thinking about having sex (also known as ” quarantine ” which is the 40 days that a woman’s body needs to recover from childbirth and that in these days the couple must abstain from sexual intercourse ).
After the control at the postpartum doctor you will have to make sure that you have healed all the wounds well , that the lochia (the discharge of blood and tissue debris) has stopped completely and that you really have the body in condition to be able to return to have sexual intercourse.
The couple should understand that sex is not possible at this time because if these recommendations are not followed, the woman could feel great discomfort and it could also take longer to heal. Women should pay attention to their bodies because each one needs a different time to get back to normal.
At the time of resuming sexual intercourse it is necessary to use a condom (since it is not exempt from getting pregnant again because there may be ovulation) and it is advisable to use vaginal lubrication to improve penetration.
IF YOU HAD A CESAREAN, EPISIOTOMY, OR OTHER PROCEDURE
If you had an episiotomy or have too many tear stitches from natural childbirth, the time to heal will depend on how extensive the cut or tear is. Even after six weeks, you may not be fully cured and feel discomfort if you try to have sex. In this case, you will have to wait until you make sure that you are really healed , you can try inserting your fingers into the vagina with lubricant to see if you feel discomfort or not before having sex.
If you feel safe you can talk about it with your partner and with the help of vaginal lubricant try to have sex little by little and with great delicacy.
OTHER FACTORS THAT YOU SHOULD TAKE INTO ACCOUNT
You should also bear in mind that hormones can make you feel somewhat emotionally unstable and that even if you are completely cured and have the body to have sex with your partner again, emotions can play a trick on you since hormones can be somewhat fluctuating until after 12 weeks of delivery.
And you should be very careful with postpartum depression as it creeps into your life and if you don’t realize it, it will want to stick around to make things more complicated. If you feel down or too listless, you need to see a doctor as soon as possible to start psychological treatment if necessary.
In addition to this, taking care of a newborn is a job that leaves you quite tired (and more if you have twins or other dependent children). This can make you leave sex aside, but you should talk with your partner about your feelings and between the two of you find solutions where you are both united and can understand and support each other.
WHEN YOU ARE NOT READY
If your partner is ready to have sex and you cannot cause problems in the couple. They may tell you that there are positions that are suitable for sexual intercourse and that it will hurt less even if you feel discomfort, but if you are not ready you should make it clear that you do not want to have sex in any of the positions that exist until you feel fully prepared. Your partner should understand.
On many occasions, even if six weeks have passed and your cesarean section has healed or the birth wounds and you feel no pain, you may not feel ready to have sex . It cannot be underestimated that your body is undergoing a very drastic change: your uterus is redicting, the wounds from the cesarean section or the episiotomy are healing, and you may feel more tired than usual.
Also, if you are breastfeeding your baby, it is likely that your libido is at low levels and that therefore you want to leave sex in second place. But instead of having sex or trying different positions, you can have sex in different ways. Some ideas are that sex is built with hugs, caresses and kisses, penetration should not always be the culmination of relationships. It is important that you and your partner feel united in this process, you can try positions with clothes to see if you feel comfortable before doing it without clothes.
Remember that it is very important to have sex with a condom since it is likely that you can get pregnant and your body needs to recover before going through another pregnancy again. Remember that when your body is fully recovered your normal libido will return and you will feel again wanting to spend intimate moments with your partner even if you feel tired.
FIND THE PASSION
It is very important that even if you are parents and the baby occupies a large part of your time, you look for a way to find the complicity that unites you as a couple. Find little moments alone to be able to be as a couple and give you affection.
But above all, when you decide to have sex for the first time after so long, in addition to looking for the positions in which you feel most comfortable, it is necessary that you also do it little by little, wanting to feel more than to reach the peak. . It is necessary that you cultivate your complicity, so that you do not forget the love that unites you and everything you feel for each other . Remember that in addition to being parents, you are also a couple and that must be cared for in the same way that a plant must be watered for it to grow: it must be done every day.
Dr. Tabriella Perivolaris, Sara's mother and fan of fashion, beauty, motherhood, among others, about the female universe. Since 2018 she has been working as a copywriter, always bringing to her articles a little of her experience and experience as a mother and woman.